The Scarlett Letter, Part 3


My correspondences with the "Scarlett Letter" writer continues:

Dear Sir,

Thank you for taking the trouble to write back. I am sorry to burden a stranger with my troubles and ugly sentiments, but I felt that I had to let you know about the real impact your blog has had on my life and to show my gratitude. You showed me that living that way was not just to take part in a carnival of thrills made more fulfilling by the implicit danger of discovery, but was also a real ordeal of painful sacrifices. As the poet says 'I, too, have the right to pursue a happy life, the difficult part is to work out a compromise for that right'. Everyone has the right to the pursuit of happiness and to keep secrets. I have my own secrets and my own life outside my family; I suppose that I was actually being selfish in demanding that he devote himself entirely to us. I have had my view of the world shattered and cannot look at my father with the same eyes of trust that my brother and sisters show; but it's really my fault for probing so relentlessly and I can start to think of him as a human being rather than a paragon. You've helped me to mature faster than I ever thought I would at (age intentionally omitted), not only in my understanding of my father but also in how I think of gay and bi-sexual people. I'm still angry and sad, and I don't know how to talk to anyone else about this; but maybe one day I'll be able to thank him for all that he has done for us. For now I can only thank you. Don't think of your sex as only tawdry and meaningless, it is part of who you are as a person and perhaps I will be able to let go of my very real sense of betrayal and say that to him.

Your children are so fortunate to have such a wonderful father, and your readers to have the benefit of your words and understanding (and, I imagine, your taste in men, although I can't really judge that for myself). 

If my clumsy writing might be of any use to others, I would be honored were it to appear on your blog. I'll keep doing my best over here; please keep up with the good work.

Yours sincerely,

Thursday...a retrospective.

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