Gay List

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Are you gay? Well, maybe I shouldn't ask that..but, do you act gay? Most of us bi guys, or guys in general prefer that they act "masculine."  After all, those that are clearly effeminate have been vilified by the straight community for decades (and some in the gay community as well).  So, here's a test that will determine if you're more of a "6" on the Kinsey scale than a "0".  Feel free to print out, take test and score (all for fun).

1.  When you hug your male friends, you

   • Are crying.
   • Are usually naked.
   • Feel uncomfortable.
   • Have just scored a touchdown.
   • Are hoping to score a "touchdown".

2. Guys that have small dogs (not puppies, small dogs) are:

   • my friends
   • cute
   • silly
   • meant to be made fun of
   • reasonable

3. Look in your pants, what do you see?

   • Bikini briefs
   • My Twig and Berries
   • Boxer Briefs
   • Tighty Whiteys
   • Boxers
   • Another Man

4. Bed and Breakfasts are:

   • Places my girlfriend drags me to.
   • Places I would like to own.
   • Nice places for an intimate getaway.
   • Um, the best places ever.
   • Like serving breakfast in bed? I don't get it.
5. 

   Look at your driver's license picture, how do you look?

   • Fabulous.
   • Like a criminal. In a mugshot.
   • I have bags under my eyes, but generally ok.
   • Like a woman.
6. 
   

   At the gym, you mostly:

   • Hang out in the locker room.
   • Try to pick up chicks.
   • Use those 3 pound weights.
   • Hang out in the steam room.

7. Whether you're gay or not depends on your gender identity. What's yours?

   • Male
   • Male seeking male   

   8. In the past week, which of these things have you shaved?

      • My chest.
      • My face.
      • My boyfriend's chest.
      • All of the above.
      • None of the above.

   9. A little fruit is:

      • A good snack.
      • My nickname.
      • The base for most great cocktails.

   10. Who should have won the best actress Oscar in 2006?

       • How could Dame Judi Dench possibly have lost?
       • Damn. I watched, but I forget who was nominated.
       • The Oscars, can you bet on those things?
       • Helen Mirren deserved it, she played Queen Elizabeth brilliantly.
   11. 

       Who is Jack Spade?

       • Isn't that a brand of something?
       • He played third base for the Reds in the 80s.
       • A bag designer. HELLO!
       • They make expensive bags that I can't afford.

   12. The reading material in your bathroom is:

       • Harpers Bazaar
       • ESPN The Magazine
       • Men's Fitness
       • Playboy
       • Playgirl
       • Jane Austen

   13. Project Runway is:

       • The construction job I am working on.
       • My favorite show.
       • Something my girlfriend watches.
       • A show that had promise, but I am over it.

   14. What do most of your dates look like?

       • Brad Pitt
       • I like boyish girls with short hair.
       • Sweet and feminine...men.  

       15. Which of these jobs sounds closest to what you want?

           • Locker room attendant.
           • Event or party planner.
           • Truck driver.
           • Model.
           • Gay porn star.

       16. The dress code at your favorite bar is:

           • As long as you have pants on, you can go in.
           • Burlesque drag.
           • Collared shirts, dress shoes, no jeans.
           • Depends on what theme night it is
           • Assless chaps and studded collars.

       17. Complete this sentence: "I will get married _____."

           • in Massachusetts or Vermont.
           • in a lovely ceremony.
           • if she gets pregnant.

       18. Quick, name a Spice Girl:

           • Ah, that hot one...married to the soccer dude.
           • Sportsky? What about Kylie Minogue? Is she one?
           • EEEEEEK! I love them!
           • Did you know they are getting back together?
           • Scary, Baby, Ginger, Posh and Sporty
       19. 

           Your socks usually

           • Match your shirt.
           • Match your pants.
           • Are dirty.
           • Match each other.  

           
           

           Stupid, I know..but good for a couple of laughs.  But, seriously..shaving your body, being fashion conscious, in shape, and knowledgeable about musicals doesn't make you gay.
           
           Having a dick in your mouth or ass?  That's gay!